Repatriation: Preparation is KEY.
2009-04-15
We all know about the challenges of living abroad, but what about the challenges of going back home - of “repatriating”?

In addition to the logistical challenges of setting up a new home and settling children into new schools, repatriation often comes with a pot full of mixed emotions - especially if it was not your choice to return home.

According to studies, 20% of returning expats - including spouses and children - suffer from “Repatriation Stress”, also commonly called “Expat Flu” or “Repatriation Blues”. Repatriation stress has many guises, and symptoms range from temporary depression to actual flu like symptoms.
Beyond the loss of financial benefits and the expatriate lifestyle, expats often long for the exchanges with different cultures and the small expat community where everyone looked out for everyone else. Worse, they sometimes realize that their values have changed and do not match any more with those of old friends and family.

So, what can you do now to reduce this coming logistical and emotional stress?

You might have no control about the move itself. But you have control over how you react to the transition itself, the mindset you want to encourage among your family and the actions you might take.

Here are 5 transition tips that will particularly help you during the difficult “Endings” stage.

1. Take the time to say goodbye
This gives a sense of rounding off, of completion and allows time to acknowledge what you will miss. If you have children, involve them in this process: how would they like to end the Beijing chapter?
Say goodbye to friends but to places too. Maybe you want to re-visit your favourite spots in Beijing: a last toboggan slide down Mutianyu, a last stroll in Jingshan Park, a last feast on Peking Duck…
All those memories will make a great family photo album of your “Last months in Beijing”.

2. Encourage open communication and positive thinking
Inform your children about the move as soon as you can and encourage everybody to speak honestly about their feelings. The sense of loss experienced during repatriation can take many shapes: mild-shock / anger / sadness / fear / groundlessness but also excitement or relief in the case of dependent family back home.
While acknowledging strong and painful emotions, don’t forget to add in your packing boxes a bit of optimism too. Practise positive affirmations such as: “I am looking forward to going back to our home culture.” or “This is a great opportunity for us to live closer to our extended family.”

3. Take care of the logistical and practical aspects
While you should have reasonable expectations of yourself and others in the family, don’t wait for the last minute to organise your move.
If you start getting crazy with “To-do” lists, then rather opt for a 2-month action plan including SMART goals (specific / measurable / attainable / realistic / time-bounded) and start delegating responsibilities within the family and possibly your relocation agent.
Don’t reinvent the wheel: you can find on the web useful checklists for your pre-move planning.

4. Think now of work re-entry
If you are the expat spouse, you might be apprehensive about future work opportunities for yourself. It is vital to prepare before you go. List the many transferable skills you have gained so that you can update your CV. Integrate achievements and skills related to paid work but also to non-paid activities (volunteering for charities, involvement in PTAs…).

If you are the working partner, be fair with yourself. Expect repatriation to be challenging and that your employer might not fully utilize your newly-gained skills upon your return. However, list your accomplishments, celebrate them and integrate them in your CV.

In both cases, research your future market, identify the opportunities that are waiting for you and establish or re-establish contacts and networks.

And other random tips
Keep your sense of humor or develop one! –
print off a farewell card with your contact details and your skype address –
know the futility of procrastination and self pity –
don’t forget to say good bye to the bag lady, the cashmere lady and the leather lady–
don’t expect your old friends to relate to your international experiences -
keep in touch with your expat friends via Facebook –
move toward your future with hope and a sense of adventure –
make new friends who have been expats themselves
fall back in love with your own country

Good luck!
Be assured that your experience in China has armed you with unique life & coping skills so you are well prepared for future challenges! And who knows? Those future adventures might bring you back to China sooner than you expect.

By Jasmine KEEL, INSPIRED Founder and Managing Director.